Let it begin. An Interview with Blag Dahlia, vocalist of The Dwarves.
What's your favorite memory of being in the Dwarves? (I bet it was the bobbleheads.)
Blag: I got a blowjob on stage at the Whiskey A Go Go. I felt just like Jim Morrison!
TX Punk: What's your favorite punk album?
Blag: Blood Guts and Pussy.
TX Punk: What's your favorite song to play live?
Blag: I like the part of I Will Deny where everyone says ‘nobody loves me, nobody cares and when I die there won’t be nobody there’.
Blag: The garage bands were so gay we couldn’t handle being around them. The punk bands were so boring we couldn’t stand playing music like them.
TX Punk: Has George Bush kept in contact since you sent him the song "River City Rapist" to be his theme song?
Blag: He’s convinced we can win the War in Vietnam.
TX Punk: I know Blag got to sing a song played in the background of Spongebob back in 99'("Doing The Sponge"[See episode "The Chaperone"]). You've probably been asked this many times, but how in god's name did Blag Dahlia get anywhere near the friggin set of Spongebob? I realize Peter Straus wrote it, but still...
Blag: They said imitate Lux Interior. I said, that’s what I’ve been doing all along!
Blag: Death is a good thing. Rebirth, not so much! Once again, we’ve made a classic that America will understand 5 years in the future. The Dwarves Are Born Again will be out in May on GREEDY records. Look for it in Kmarts and WalMarts all over the country. They won’t have it, but look for it anyway. Then buy it from us at-
TX Punk: You guys are pretty much the most vulgar, and obnoxious(music wise) band I can think of... And you still have a large girl fan base. How do you do it?
Blag: We have enormous penises!
TX Punk: Dwarves are apparently making a lot of TV/film(about half X Rated it seems) appearances is there any show you want to get on and haven't yet?
Blag: Meet the Press.
Blag: HeWhoCanNotBeNamed made a new record- Sunday School Massacre. An instant classic. And look for Candy Now, a Dwarves retro female vocal blend with something for everyone and nothing for everybody else.
TX Punk: Any last words?
Blag: Go to the site and check us out. Dirty pics and vids, free songs, a bullshit history of the band. You can’t miss!
TX Punk: Thanks.